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How to Catch Old Ironjaw, the Total Asshole

Alright, so I'm a sick individual. The coolest thing in World of Warcraft to me is the achievement Accomplished Angler. How badass does Salty McQoqenspiel sound!? I'm not yet halfway through this achievement, although last night I took a few key steps. I got my lure quest for Deadliest Catch, completed the Scavenger, and finally caught Old Ironjaw!


For those of you interested in this little bastard here are a few pointers:
  1. First, make sure you don't have anything to do for like 10 fucking hours, or make sure you're fine logging in and out while standing on molten lava in a goddamned enemy city for a few days.
  2. Fly to Kargath, the closest Horde point. If you're alliance, then eat shit.
  3. Run north through the alliance zones Fairy Pixie Land and Elven Sweetcheeks Valley until you get to the ramp at the bottom of the entrance to Ironforge.
  4. At this point, I hope you're high-level. You really should be, because you can't get Salty until you can A) Fly and B) frollick around Northrend fishing places. The guards in Ironforge will bend you over and fuck you sideways, so expect to die several times getting to the magic fishing spot. Let's call it the G-spot.
  5. Basically at this point you jet up the ramp as fast as you can and run as far as you can until you die from guards jacking you or alliance screwing with you. Your basic path should be to first get to the top of the ramp. Then, hang a left and get inside, running straight into the city. It will open up a bit and you'll go across some lava. Right ahead you'll see a doorway on your left, head for that. Run through the tunnel and it should deposit you right in front of the main forge area. You'll see two giant wheels, left and right. What you need to do is make it as close to the right wheel as possible before dying, and preferably die in the lava pool attached to the right wheel. Just jump right in that shit and die!
  6. Come back as a ghost but don't res quite yet. This is the trick. Swim towards the wheel until you're up against the wall. You should be able to jump out of the lava as normal. There is an invisible shelf where the hub of the wheel is. The best way to jump up and land on this shelf is to keep jmping against the wall, edging closer to the center of the wheel each time. Eventually you'll jump up out of the lava, edge closer, and land on the G-spot. STAY STILL! turn to face the lava, res, and start fishing. You'll have to zoom the camera all the way back and put it directly above your dude. It's a pain in the ass but allies usually don't screw with you here. If they do, they usually die which is funny to watch because they don't know how to get on the ledge.
  7. Fish for 100 fucking hours, this jerk is as rare as a cool republican. Seriously, it took me 500 casts. The good news is that I leveled fishing past 300 doing it. You can also level an entire guild of alts' cooking with the shitty fish you catch.
Catch the bitch and port the hell out!